Change of plan.....

OK....I know it isn't anything close to the snow the Eastern US is getting but it has messed up my plans to go into Albuquerque today. This storm arrived a half a day earlier than expected. Luckily the fridge and the pantry have food, but I may have to get a little creative in what I choose to put together for dinner tonight.
On the positive side I have a chance to write those Holiday cards I've been putting off......and how can this kind of weather not inspire the process. And my creative brain has been kicked into gear overnight by this lovely bead and storywoman .....so me thinks my hands may be in clay later today exploring. The stores will wait...... and it will be a funner day. I know you are thinking what kind of word is funner?.......but this change of plan will be just that....... funner.

Currently.........

I feel like everything inside of me is different. I feel completely different from the way I felt a year ago or two years ago or three years ago. The change within is motivating me to change the outside of me. Not just my physical body - but also my environment. The change within is making me realize that my time management is in chaos. It's cluttered and disorganized.

Of course we are always changing. How we feel is always in flux. What I'm referring to is a fundamental change and not just the slow changes occurring all the time. There are beliefs and habits I've carried around and used for years that no longer work. I've held on to things in my past and I no longer want to keep accumulating them.

Clearing through my parent's past - their memories and stuff has had a huge impact on creating this fundamental change inside me. The job was overwhelming and mostly it is finished yet not quite. What is left to do is motivating my own willingness to deal with my own life of memories and stuff and interests. What I've learned from this task so far is that so much is not important - what remains after someone is gone is the love - the memories of the essential energy of that person. All the stuff - even the stuff that is connected to the memories is only stuff and not really all that important.

I want to live in the present moment. That is the life I want.

I'm old enough now to have accumulated a lot of hobbies and I see how it is all too much. The most important things to me are not getting done because I have been holding too tightly to the past in the form of someday projects. I chose to be in the position of being a sifter and sorter of my parent's stuff. And it has in all honesty been a burden AND (I hope my Mom can somehow get this too) it's been a wonderful teaching for me. My important things aren't getting done because I let my cluttered time management - or lazy time management - keep me from taking action on the things important to me. I see how I can accumulate better choices and little by little they add up to creating the life I want instead of being buried and stuck in the clutter of a lifetime.

So this is where I'm at currently:

Decluttering is my biggest passion right now.
Here is a partial list of things to be purged and organized:

• stuff,
• mementos and memorabilia of the past(see note below),
• habits that are no longer useful,
• outdated beliefs,
• clothes,
• email,
• digital photos (not sorted well enough to find them when I want them)
  
• digital files,
• paperfiles,
• projects I want to "someday do" and clearly will never do,
• books,
• CD's - cassette tapes(yikes!),

*mementos, memorabilia of past - I'm not talking about getting rid of everything from the past but giving the stuff I keep an honorable display and letting go of the rest.


I want to live in the present moment. I want to use my time here on earth - I want to use my precious sweet life wisely. So the other place I find myself is getting into integrity. Making my environment in sync with who I am and using my time to support who I am. Granted I know that this accumulation didn't happen overnight and it won't change overnight but this is where I'm at - little by little beginning to make different choices.

These are the priorities:
Decluttering, time management, and doing what is most important to me right now. What has fundamentally changed inside of me is this: I no longer need to keep this "stuff" as an excuse to living a powerful creative life in the present moment. I used to think I could get to clearing the clutter someday - but meanwhile I keep adding more and more to it.

I'm back... but prepare yourselves....because my blog content may become a lot about adding by subtracting........

Topics coming soon on my blog:

• I've been tagged to give you random and weird things about me
• the importance of declaring oneself a writer
• My currently favorite books
• sprinkled with decluttering inspiration
• photos of course
  
• updates on time management
• and the posts about the important stuff to me which is writing and creativity!

Retreat

In honor of Halloween I offer this photo of an orb weaver's web. I am fairly sure these spiders will build a new web each night - so here is the day's creation shining in the morning sun.

I've decided to go on retreat. I'm not sure exactly what that means. I just know that for the month of November I'm going be more than do. I'll figure it out as I go along. The whole point is to offer myself some extra rest and loving kindness. I do know that I will reduce my time spent on my computer for this month - which means I may not be getting around to read many blogs. I may not respond to email too quickly either.

I have also decided that in honor of my retreat I am going to post only photos on my blog. I have no plans to write anything here until December. But I will post a photo sometimes. Wishing you all a Happy Harvest Season......... Love and Light to you..........

Declutter Flu

Been away a little long. I caught the declutter re-organizing flu. I've still got a touch of it and it may be a long recovery. The good news is I am feeling a little lighter and less bogged down. May be able to go in my studio soon and work on creative projects without feeling the weight of all that needs to be sorted out and cleared away.
I feel like I'm making room. Opening up space. Making room for more clay projects and more multi media and collage play. I feel as if each thing I find a proper home for and each thing I release to a new home is opening up an area in my life that will allow for new friends and new work and new creative inspiration. Each little project that has been waiting because it was a low priority that I take care of releases that "I did it - I finally did it - energy!"

I didn't realize I was complaining about the mess and how it didn't work until my husband seemed so proud of me for doing something about it rather than having a meltdown over and over again about it.

Having to clear out my mother's home this year really taught me a lot about what's important. You can't take it with you. So I am finding a balance of keeping things I love - letting go of things that are getting in the way. Finding other ways to honor the past without allowing it to be a space hog crowding out the present precious moment.

I was at the library this week - looking for low fat cookbooks (another current project of mine). Along the same aisle, I passed the organizing books and Sandra Felton's book Organizing Magic leapt out at me. Now I realize reading about organizing doesn't get one any closer to getting the job done. But it looked like a little book to inspire me while I'm down with this declutter flu.....

Here are a few quotes from Felton's book:

Organizing is not nearly as important as many other things in life. But what it delivers often is priceless. - Sandra Felton

A year from now you may wish you had started today. - Karen Lamb, author

Every minute you procrastinate putting something back where it belongs is a cluttered minute. -Sandra Felton

A habit cannot be tossed out the window: it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.
-Mark Twain

So, this is where I'm at......away from the computer mostly.....I have my clay work in an art show at the Harwood Art Center in Albuquerque. Next week - I'll show you the work - you had a sneak peak earlier here.

I'll leave you with some images from the last week of my sacred life - clouds - more clouds I can't seem to help myself they have been so magical this year

My Sacred Life

The past two days I've been unfocused. I've been avoiding having fun or enjoying my life. For that matter I haven't even gotten any chores or responsibilities accomplished. I've been swinging on the pendulum from feeling inspired and anything is possible to the other side which is feeling discouraged. Nothing much seems as possible and I feel as if I'm spinning my wheels. Okay, okay, I know this sounds so dramatic. I think I am just crashing after the fun of the Writer's Spa. I've had a bit of grief arise again too......and even though I usually don't go around announcing these things - durnit - I have PMS.
Ah well, I know enough at 38 years old that this too will pass......And that is why I like Carla's beautiful idea over at Zena Musings to do a project called My Sacred Life. Perhaps it is a way to balance out the pendulum swing a little bit and not feel as if I'm swinging so wildly. So, I don't know if I'll offer a picture every day but I will think and look and be present with my sacred life at least once each day and try to offer a photo and some words about it here as time allows. I am grateful for my life and sometimes one just has to get out camera and with it's help open their eyes to all there is to be grateful about.
My husband made me comfort food tonight to cheer me up and put a smile of my face. And he gave me the perfect image to begin my sacred life series. Tomorrow we celebrate our 4th anniversary. Happy Anniversary Sweetness!

Follow your come alive impulse

I walked my back yard labyrinth this morning. I prayed for guidance. The wonderful shimmer of the Writer's Spa has worn off. I could allow that to get me really depressed as if I've lost something. Or I could be with what is. Yes, the glow isn't as strong and the harsh reality of taxes, to do lists, and making a living are chomping at my heals. Yet, there is a gift here in just slowing down and settling into what is happening in this moment now.
Standing in my labyrinth, I asked for guidance. As I walked back out of the labyrinth I remembered that during the spa my cell phone rang in the middle of the night. It was a wrong number. Upon being startled awake I decided to listen to the radio until my heartbeat came back down to normal. This is what I heard within a sermon about one's purpose and God's plan. The minister or preacher (I don't know who he was) said this "You must do what you know otherwise all that you do not know will paralyze you."


So this morning, I know how to show up at my studio. I know what the next steps are for my current clay mandala. I know how to sit down and make a daily lump (I began those again!). I may not know how I'm going to do a thousand things I feel called to do. I may not know how I'll learn what I need to learn. I cannot worry about those things. Some things one just has to say to them- "I will not be paralyzed by you" and trust that Divine Spirit will show me the way as I am ready to take a risk. Right now, my only job is to show up and follow what makes me come alive. Each day is a new opportunity to be in that present moment. So the glow of the spa has worn off but that is only a problem if I grasp at trying to hold onto it.

Maybe I could take a different approach - maybe I could slip into wonderment - and I wonder what would happen if I follow my next come alive impulse.......I know how to write and and post on my blog...and I know where my studio is.......off I go.....to work......