Follow your come alive impulse

I walked my back yard labyrinth this morning. I prayed for guidance. The wonderful shimmer of the Writer's Spa has worn off. I could allow that to get me really depressed as if I've lost something. Or I could be with what is. Yes, the glow isn't as strong and the harsh reality of taxes, to do lists, and making a living are chomping at my heals. Yet, there is a gift here in just slowing down and settling into what is happening in this moment now.
Standing in my labyrinth, I asked for guidance. As I walked back out of the labyrinth I remembered that during the spa my cell phone rang in the middle of the night. It was a wrong number. Upon being startled awake I decided to listen to the radio until my heartbeat came back down to normal. This is what I heard within a sermon about one's purpose and God's plan. The minister or preacher (I don't know who he was) said this "You must do what you know otherwise all that you do not know will paralyze you."


So this morning, I know how to show up at my studio. I know what the next steps are for my current clay mandala. I know how to sit down and make a daily lump (I began those again!). I may not know how I'm going to do a thousand things I feel called to do. I may not know how I'll learn what I need to learn. I cannot worry about those things. Some things one just has to say to them- "I will not be paralyzed by you" and trust that Divine Spirit will show me the way as I am ready to take a risk. Right now, my only job is to show up and follow what makes me come alive. Each day is a new opportunity to be in that present moment. So the glow of the spa has worn off but that is only a problem if I grasp at trying to hold onto it.

Maybe I could take a different approach - maybe I could slip into wonderment - and I wonder what would happen if I follow my next come alive impulse.......I know how to write and and post on my blog...and I know where my studio is.......off I go.....to work......

walking

This is the only digital photo I have of the labyrinth at my old house. I thought I had posted it before, but I couldn't find it in my archives. I have other photos taken from the rooftop view - but until I have a scanner I won't be able to show you. Speaking of scanners I hope to have one hooked up soon so I can begin scanning all these family photos (more on that later).

The labyrinth at my old house came to be because I had this curved patio. When I bought that house there was no longer a lawn - it was just a blank space. I was thinking of doing a circular rock and plant design and then I stumbled onto a book about labyrinths. I realized I had just enough room to put in a labyrinth.

When you live in the desert you look for ways to do landscaping in way that does not require a lot of water. Around here, it is not uncommon to hear upon inquiry of how was your weekend - oh, we moved a lot of rock.

When our current house was built the back had to be torn up to put in the septic system. Now we have a space to put in the labyrinth I showed you on my last post. This labyrinth will evolve as we go along but it's great to have the design of it already here enough to walk.

This weekend I'll be walking through a wildflower hike and hopefully learning what some of these plants are called. I'll be walking through a few of the art studios of Placitas artists. I'll be walking through my first mother's day without my Mom. It was one year ago that we learned my Mom was sick. As I walk I'll be thinking of my Mom.

As I walk I'm be sending love to my sister and my brother's. As I walk, I'll be sending healing thoughts to two of my Aunts who lost sons this year. I'll be sending healing thoughts to other bloggers who have lost their mother's this year. As I walk I'll be sending loving kindness to all who have lost someone dear to them. I have to admit I'm not looking forward to walking through the day. Tears will be there, but I hope joy in living and remembering good times too.

Yet, walk I will. Walk I must. One step at a time is the only way we make it through all these life transitions. So my heart goes out to everyone this weekend. I will walk the labyrinth and send a Happy Mother's day to all mothers and their children.

Back to it.........

I took a two week blog break. The first week was all about getting my parent's house on the market. It was an exhausting week. Last week was somewhere between here and back there. What I mean is that it passed by with a kind of transitional ease. I wasn't in the thick of it anymore with the estate and Mom's house. There were a few details - repairs, meeting the real estate agent, etc. I did some other things for myself like getting to the dentist, and going to yoga, and meeting my art group. I wasn't in the job of what I'd been doing for 5 months anymore and yet I wasn't into a new routine either - hence the week seemed to pass by without much definition. I just wasn't in the mood to try to read or write blogs so I had an unannounced break.



Several weeks ago on Earth Day (as it coincidentally turned out) my husband and I planned out exactly where our backyard labyrinth is going to be. My husband really wanted to get working on the backyard and he needed to know where the labyrinth will be. We will probably do most of the work around the edges of the labyrinth and then finalize the labyrinth last. It will probably get some crushed gravel for the walk and more rocks to define the path. In the center we plan to put some sort of stone benches. The really nice part of this plan is that although the labyrinth isn't finished it is there. I am now able to walk it.

Labyrinths are good for transitions. I'm very glad to have the labyrinth back. When we moved I had to leave my backyard labyrinth behind. Though we knew we'd create another one here at the new house. It seems to me, that the very act of walking a labyrinth helps one understand and settle into transitions. You enter and walk around and then switch back and walk around and then switchback again - making seven circuits(switchbacks) until you get to the center. All those switchbacks can feel disorienting if you're not familiar with the movement. I find it very comforting to be able to use this form of movement again. It reminds me that life is filled with transitions but there is a larger pattern (usually). Just keep placing one foot in front of the other.

This particular design is called a seven circuit. I made the center bigger (appox 6 feet by 6.5 feet). Changing the center makes the whole thing stretch and change shape. On the right hand side - kind of where that yellow bucket is we need a pathway beside the labyrinth so we can walk down to the mailbox or down to get the Sunday paper. I sort of fit the design into the space I had and I love how the outcome looks like a brain. I think walking the labyrinth is good for your brain. Or at least right now my brain feels calmed by it.