round two thousand

If you read my last post - "the mislabeled detour" - then you're likely to think that I've got it together. It's funny how the greater powers that be - whatever you call them comes along to test you. The details I cannot share because they are too personal to put out there into blog land. I know I'm sitting within an opportunity for growth - but it hurts. The past has come back up to question me - are you really so okay with how it all happened 12 years ago? The truth is I'm not. I still get caught in a place where I regret making the choices I made twelve years ago. Actually now it is thirteen years ago. I also feel alone. I know I am not alone. I know there are people who care and can have compassion. It's hard to feel as if there really isn't anyone that fully understands what I've been through. I know I have the opportunity to give up this sorry victim story - but today it keeps coming back to live another round.